Over on my other blog I did a post about accepting criticism. It got me thinking about some differences between my home and the land of my birth.
What happens when cirticism is part of the culture?
Kiwis fascinate me. This little island nation, its population roughly the size of a single major city, has produced some of the world's best artists, athletes, scientists and inventors. In a way, it reminds me of the first hundred years of my birth country, the United States.
Of course, life in Another Land has a certain, Through the Looking Glass quality: any time something starts to look familiar, culture shock waits, a sting in the tail.
In this case, it's how my two countries treat excellence.
I grew up in America. We were Masters of the Universe, proud citizens of a land that stretched from sea to shining sea, and we celebrated every single one of our many accomplishments. Sometimes, we celebrated things that weren't even accomplishments, exactly. In my memory, we were too busy waving our index fingers in the air and shouting "We're #1!" to care.
Kiwis are... different. They have a saying here, "It's the tall poppy gets cut down."
And it does. From the time they're little kids, New Zealanders grow up knowing that to stand out is to court the cruelty of their peers. Those who grow to be outstanding writers, painters, dancers, athletes, etc. present a very, *very* humble public face.
Sports stars don't dance in the end zone. They put the ball down and trot back to their team. They don't say a word about going to Disneyland but instead compliment the other team and thank their fellow players. I find this refreshing.
Of course, this has its dark side. A lot of NZ's best and brightest go overseas to live. The money's better, there's more talent to work with, and their neighbours won't call them 'full of themselves'.
And it can be hardest on the only-slightly-tall poppy: the person who lost a lot of weight, or built a successful business, or completed university later in life.
I'm sure family and friends are only reinforcing cultural values by preventing those folks' egos from raging out of control, but for someone who grew up in a more... celebratory culture, it looks an awful lot like sniping, small and petty and mean.
But what do I know? Ten years in, I remain a stranger in a strange land...
9 comments:
Hello stranger...this flower don't have any secret they only is nice to look at :)
Well stranger hope that I will see you soon :)
Interesting and thought provoking post Steve.
I hate the dog eat dog culture we are seeing in the UK today. Children use 'Loser' as a word to insult someone.
I guess we all want to win and as it is impossible for everyone to win all the time we need to know how to take a loss with grace.
There are up and down sides to this. I remember shortly after moving "home" from Oz, i was doing the self-deprecating thing around my mom's family, laughing about having bought the worst house on the block, and she pulled me aside and said, "Don't DO that! They don't know you're kidding." I'd forgotten that Americans blow their own horn rather than putting themselves down.
...Hmmmmmmm.......
You had a lot of courage to move somewhere else. As someone who was never, ever infected with patriotism or "love of country", I would piss and moan and threaten to leave. But always there was the understanding that I would face a certain kind of culture shock, and so I remained where I was rooted.
Steve, I understood where you stand, as I lived in England for two years after uprooting myself. It was a whole different lifestyle, with an inside out kind of viewpoints on things. One of the places I worked at still considered Canada as being "the colonies across the pond".
However, celebrity Canadians used to be humble when suddenly noted by the outside world; but it seems we're coming out of the woods.
Your blog keeps getting better and better! Your older articles are not as good as newer ones you have a lot more creativity and originality now keep it up!
Post a Comment